A Morningstar analyst has a clever take on that old reliable treat bearer, the Girl Scout cookie seller and her relationship to mutual funds.
His muse was colleague Langdon Healys seven-year-old daughter who, when she knocked on doors, cleverly pitched her boxes of thin mints for "four for $20" rather than "one for $5."
So the analyst, Gregg Wolper, decided to imagine a world in which Girl Scout cookies were peddled like mutual funds. "Its a scary thought," he wrote.
His hypothetical situation has a Girl Scout ringing a doorbell, and telling the customer that if he buys a "Box A" type of peanut butter cookie, it will cost him $4. But if the decision is made to buy a "Box B" type, it will cost him nothing now, and nothing when the box is delivered.
But the caveat is that if he eats Box B too fast, he will have to pay. The price is $4 if consumed by the first week, $3 if consumed by the second week, etc. But then, the issue of fees is brought up. The Girl Scout takes out a card, and says that for a "B" Box, she gets a quarter a week.
Wolper goes on, to the point where the customer wants to buy a "Z" box. The Girl Scout tells him that although they only cost $1, she can only sell those boxes to institutional clients.
- His nightmare ends with the door slamming.