Most outrageous client requests

A long-time, elderly client had been trying his luck with the online dating world. We talk often and he would let me know how it was going. He made a few connections that weren’t the best.

One day he asked me if I could help him with his online dating profile. I hesitantly obliged. “Sure,” I said. “I have never made one for myself but I can try to help.”

After that I prayed he would forget he asked for my help. The prayers have worked … so far.

I once had a client who asked me about a signed Babe Ruth baseball that he had in his possession. He felt that it was a great addition to his financial plan because similar baseballs had been sold for tens of thousands, and in some rare cases, hundreds of thousands of dollars.

What he failed to realize was that this was a highly illiquid investment. His item would need to be authenticated first. Additionally, this was a thin market. There just aren’t that many baseball memorabilia collectors who have the means to buy an item at such a high price. It could take quite a bit of time to find a buyer, making the value of that signed baseball very hard to redeem.

I believe it was in 2017, via our partnership with a local bank, that I received a call from a prospect wanting to meet with me. We scheduled an appointment and the following day I drove to meet him.

In our meeting we discussed everything that is normally part of the conversation. The client signed over $100,000 and asked us to buy him several defense stocks (defense being military and weapons manufacturers, etc.)

The next day we enter the orders and all is well. The following week he calls me very angrily wanting to discuss fees (which were presented very clearly the week before and he agreed with them) it was somewhere along the lines of 1%. However when he saw $1,000 come out of the account it shocked him. That’s not all that uncommon.

What was uncommon is that the stocks we purchased in two business days were up over 6%, making the client roughly $6,000! Instead of having us sell the stocks and continue to manage his money for him making a gain of $5,000 (net of fees) in three days, he told us to reverse the trade and return his money, making him no profit at all.